Monday, June 14, 2021

I'm not getting better.

I used to be decent when I was 12 - I would consistently improve at meets and I had near JO times. I'm 14 now and after the pandemic, everything started to go downhill. I have no idea why. I train harder and I've improved my technique, I've increased the duration and intensity of my dryland workouts, yet I always feel fatigued and always gas out very quickly during an event. I've been to 5 meets now after the pandemic - 3 scy and 2 scm, and I've only dropped a second or less for a few events. The only reason I've dropped is that I've grown in height and muscle mass - I haven't improved at all. In everything else, I've been adding and adding. I don't want to sound all self-absorbed but I rarely slack during practices and I would say I'm one of the hardest workers. However, my friends on the same team, who go to practices 3-4 times a week and slack off while I go 5-6 are constantly improving and even making JOs. While I know progress isn't going to be linear, I still don't understand why I haven't improved at all after 8 months of hard training. I've watched my peers swim - they're able to pace and even somewhat sprint events like 200 fly while I gas out on the 75. They're able to hold consistent and fast speeds in the 400, 800, and even the mile, while I can only get by with a very slow pace. It's been nearly 4 years of swimming now, and I still can't sprint the 100 fly, while my friends who slack off and barely practice can do so somewhat routinely. I feel like a disappointment to my dad, who spends a lot of time, effort, and money on me - he tries to improve my technique and look for ways to do so, he pays for and drives me to meets even though he has an injury, and he watches every single practice I go to. While I find the almost daily conversations/lectures about swimming very annoying, I can see that he really cares, and I haven't been reciprocating with my results. He's super pissed right now after I did completely dog water in the 400m free because apparently everyone else in my heat was near sprinting while I looked like I was "on vacation". Sorry for the long post.

submitted by /u/Tamed_tree
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